A Journey to Self-Honesty and Breaking the Habit of Self-Deception
Recent events in my personal life have made me realize something about honesty. When it comes to honesty, we are generally referring to being honest in our relationship with others. But, what about being honest with oneself?
Parents expect kids to be honest; however, parents know very well that being honest in every interaction is impossible and sometimes even harmful. How can parents explain this to their children? Rules need to be black and white for children since we feel they can’t understand the complexity. As we get older, the rules start entering the gray zone. I have politely lied to my family, friends, and colleagues when I feel uncomfortable with something they desperately want me to try. As an introvert, I have had friends who wanted to socialize all the time when all I wanted was some alone time. I can’t tell that to my friends because they will probably feel rejected, but I can always make excuses like I don’t have a sitter to watch my kids.
That being said, the real problems in our lives don’t stem from dishonesty to others, but from lying to ourselves. Looking back, I have been most dishonest with myself. I picked a major that I thought would guarantee respect. While I graduated with a 4.0 GPA, I couldn’t do well in my job. Not because I wasn’t good at it, but because I had social anxiety. I…
